AN AMATEUR'S GUIDE TO PLAY WITH YOUR DOG

God, we are nuts about our dogs

You could say we are stupid about our dogs and I wouldn't exactly disagree. North Americans spend billions of dollars on our dogs, from overpaying for them at a breeder, to allowing vets to tell us that a biweekly "wellness" test really will add 100 years to our dog's life, to buying it Organic Naturally Caught And We Cried On the Salmon's Spirit dog food, to buying the dog the absolute latest in squeaky-flying-floating-spinning-smellsjustlikeasquirrel toy .. And yes, there is a pretty full doggie toy box in my house

We love our dogs. We want them to be happy. But sometimes I think that we want so much, we've forgotten about what they need.

I spend a lot of time in dog parks and not just the one I'm paid to spend time in. I mean public dog parks. I've written about them before, probably ad nauseum.

Our new house has put us in proximity to Earl Bales Park which has a large fenced in public dog park. It occurred to me that all of dogs, Gigs Hayley and now Terra, have enjoyed this park for some part of their lives.

These parks have their place and their purpose. They are a good place for dogs to gather and for dogs to socialize. Society is important to dogs ... I often see Miss Terra in the yard, on her lounger, sipping green tea and purusing the New York Times Society Pages ... Ok, that's an exaggeration of course. She reads the Yarker Times. It only takes 2 seconds to read and it is completely appropriate to pee upon when you're done

But dogs being able to be dogs in the society of other dogs, that is a very positive thing. Though we often ignore things like age and gender and alpha/dom status as we toss all the dogs in there and wonder why things get sometimes .. wait for it .. hairy

Dogs need to communicate with other dogs in the ways that only dogs can. As much as we love them and as much as they us right back, us sniffing their butts .. well .. it's just a bit creepy. Yeh, just a bit.

But dogs do need to socialize with us, dogs need to be with us, dogs need to play with us. Play. With. Us.

People run with their dogs, cycle with their dogs, hike with their dogs, swim with their dogs ... these are all great. All dogs need exercise and they want to be with us so why not combine the two

But what about playing with your dog. Just playing with her. A ball, a stick, a frisbee, a stuffie, a rope .. I'm not one for playing tug of war with my border collies but I don't universally condemn it; it's a dog game and I leave dog games to dogs, hence the dog parks

Play provides your dog with exercise but that's not the strength of it, like the co operative play with other dogs, the dog wants to play with you two. And if you play the games where you are in charge, as in let me throw this now you bring it back to me, you establish your dominance in a very co operative way.

Some people and their dogs do canine sports, like competitive frisbee or flyball or agility. These are great. I do a little of that with Terra but just on our own in the backyard. This establishes such a deep lovely bond with your dog and, again, while you are playing, your roles are clearly defined.

Dogs like to have these roles defined

Not everyone has the time or temperment to do an organized sport and that goes for people as well as dog. Terra certainly could participate in organized sport but then I'd have to be around all those people .. ugh

Watching these sports on TV can seem imtimidating. I watch some real experienced dog trainers and feel Hell, I can never do that. I also watch some dog trainers and think Hell, anyone can do that ..

Don't worry about that. Anyone can play with their dog.

 Take her to the dog park, take her on nice long leashed walks but don't forget to play with her. Do whatever works for the two of you, don't worry if "you're good at it" don't be concerned how far you can throw the stick or the frisbee or the ball. Just throw the damn thing.

I'm running into people, lots of people who say "Oh I can't throw that" well yes you can, even if it's only two feet who cares, your dog will be happy to go for it. Other people will say "he won't bring it back" Well this happens, Hayley was not the world's greatest retriever so we developed a format of walking in the park, I'd throw the stick, she'd run to get it then wait till I caught up, drop it then go again .. At least she was giving it to me, in her way, that's co operation

You can train your dog to retrieve. Start small, make it easy, set up for success. Start in your living room, sit on the floor, have the dog just a few inches away from you, throw the object, if she catches it encourage her to bring a back. Use a treat. Dogs are bribeable, they don't feel ashamed about it. When the dog doesn't return the object just keep encouraging her, it may require patience, go through a variety of rewards until something clicks, then Reward, Praise, Love, Repeat.

Find out what works for your dog. Some dogs, like border collies, track objects. If your dog follows the course of a toy while it's in the air then there's a good chance it may learn to take it out of the air. If it waits till it hits the ground then it may not be a flyer but if it looks at the toy, if it becomes interested in it once it lands, then it should retrieve.

Take your time, don't give up, keep at it. Training can be play too.

Look at your dog. Right now, look at his eyes.

Know what he's saying to you?

Come play with me.

BORDER COLLIE WEATHER

Rain stings my face.

Back in the trees, I could not feel it; it's not a heavy rain, it's an early spring rain and this spring that means cold and sharp and it clings to my beard. I bow my head, pull up my hood and move forward into the low rolling hills of the ravine.

Terra breaks out of the trees behind me. She pauses there on the crest of the hill, just as I had. Her eyes narrow in the rain but her muzzle raises up almost of its own volition it seems and I can see her nostrils flare as she fills her mind and her body with the scents all around her.

The ears come up, just for a second pricked in the classic Border Collie way but that is not her way and after a moment the ears lay back down. I've gotten about 20 feet ahead of her and of course, that will not do. The head lowers just a bit, her long lanky body surges forward, the muscles moving under her glossy black fur like the current of a deep cold dark river.

She is at my side in seconds; she slows, not quite pausing and tilts her head just enough to let me know that she is looking at me. I move my hand in a practised way and I quietly say "Go ahead little girl."

And she goes.

Due to the weather, the big park is empty. Green rolling hills fringed with elm trees and willows and poplars. I know that there is a street just beyond those trees, that overpasses arch above us but I can ignore that.

Terra is moving ahead of me, not full out running but moving swiftly, tail up and curled with its distinctive crook in the end, her nose down, running it through the wet grass.

She is scenting, or trying to scent. Border collies are not scent dogs, they are sight dogs. When Terra wants something she "asks with here eyes" which means usually laying down on her belly and staring at the object she desires ... and I mean staring. Eyes locked on, body incredibly still, I swear her breathing changes; this is entire focus this is concentration, this is a dog saying "You idiot it's there, it's right there, that thing, right there!"

But now she is moving through the high grass, the wetness clinging to the long feathered fur on the backs of her legs, he nose down, head swinging. She is not a scent dog. Up north one winter I found deer tracks, fairly fresh, in the snow and I put her nose right in them; off she went, following the scent, till she got to the point where the deer tracks went right. Terra went left.

But she is just casting now, curious, picking up scents of other dogs, squirrels, raccoons maybe. There are coyotes in this ravine. I'm not sure what she would do if she scented them, run like hell probably. She's a smart dog.

We come to a part where the ravine becomes quite steep, the wooded slope rising up at a very sharp angle to a height of about 30 or 40 feet. She goes to where the wall of the ravine begins to rise; she stops, turns only her head to look at me, mouth open tongue lolling eyes bright. I quietly say "Go ahead little girl."

And she goes.

She flies straight up, very fast, easily leaping over logs, flowing under branches, fearless; she's scented a squirrel and she begins to bark, still running, moving fast, totally happy in that moment,

I continue along the trail, heading back into thicker trees as Terra runs the ravine, sometimes barking sometimes quiet, intense and focussed at one moment then completely hyper and loud and explosive in the next.

I lose sight of her from time to time in the trees but I know she knows where I am. She is my border collie and I am her master, her leader, her shepherd if you will. She always knows where I am.

The rain is getting heavier now, soaking through my hoodie. I shove my hands into my pockets, hunching my shoulders. Terra comes bounding down the wall of the ravine at full speed, her fur soaked through, her normally full tail looking rat like.

She is smiling. She is happy. She comes barreling along the trail, mud spattering and sticking to her fur. She skids to a halt right in front of me, the mouth open her eyes gleaming. She tilts here head as if to say "Where to next"

When I had Hayley and Terra together we had a "dog park friend" a lady from England who also had two border collies. She had grown up with the breed. One day we were in the park with our four days, a day much like this one, with low clouds and cold blowing rain and an empty ravine. We were miserable us two humans but the four border collies were ranging ahead of us; quiet and swift and feeling the roll of the hills, their noses in their wind, eyes slitted against the cold hard rain.

The lady stopped me with her hand and had me watch the dogs for a moment. "Look at them. They love this. This is border collie weather."

So now she is at my feet, looking up at me as if to ask "Where to next"

I pull the hood tighter around my head, feeling the sting of the rain and I say to her "Go ahead little girl"

And we go

LOVE SMELLS LIKE BUTT

Valentine's Day is an asinine holiday. It's artificial. It exists only to create profit

Valentine's Day is for asses

And it may for those who like to smell asses

Settle down, it's not like that

It's more like this

MISS TERRA GOES COTTAGING

Life is hard, we all need a break.

An escape from the stress and routine of our daily lives. Here in Canada there is a long standing tradition of taking advantage of the wilderness that often lays close to our door, offering us some sense of tranquility and even peace, shedding our drudgery for sunlight and water and the wind in the evergreens.

Yeh, life is hard, especially for Miss Terra, so much stress that is derived from so many decisions that need to be made, like: Which bed should I take a nap on, or which stuffie needs to be tossed around the house and which ball (the orange and blue one or the blue and orange one) should I drop in somebody's life .. Damn, the pressure. A girl needs to escape it and get up to Springhaven Lodge on the Georgian Bay and let the wind flow through her fur and the water splash across her whiskers

Miss Terra is, of course, from a very high and rarified society. Much like the blue bloods (or more accurately wannabe blue bloods) who lounge in the million dollar mansions that command the islands which dot the Bay, this border collie concerns herself with the most erudite of social activities

Such as, Olympic javelin:

Or a rousing game of tennis:

A highly charged soccer match:

The new hybrid sport of soccer and water polo called Water Polo or in the vernacular: I'm gonna drown this soccer ball

And one must always make time for a rousing game of: Find the amphibian

One, of course, can not over concern oneself with all this physical activity, that would simply be boorish. One must take some time to be still and enjoy all of nature's bounty ...

... or one could simply obsess over one's frisbee, border collie style

And if you have concluded that the sole purpose of this post was to post more pics and videos of Terra playing up north .. well .. the proper blue blood response to that would have to be ... duh

HOW TO INTERPET DOG

It's an age old, oft asked question: What does my mean? What does she want? I wish she could talk!!

Well, we know that dogs communicate, amongst themselves they use a combo of body posture, vocalizations, scent and factors we probably can't understand.

With us, they communicate the way we teach them: We teach to "speak" but really all they are doing is giving a conditioned response to a preset signal. It's a learned behaviour, not necessarily how the dog would choose to communicate with us

I think that for every time we say "I wish I knew what she ways saying!" the dog is thinking "Why doesn't he hear what I'm saying"

Well, with the help of Terra, I've created a little video guide to help you interpret Dog

STORM? WHAT STORM?

Readers in central Canada and the eastern US with relate to this today:

"Snowmagheddon!"

"Storm of the century!"

"Stay inside!"

"WORST WINTER STORM EVER!"

Indeed, my area's first real winter storm in a couple of years. More snow falling in one day than most of last winter .. but last winter we barely got 30 cms of snow altogether.

Anyway, the media never wastes an opportunity to drum up some hysteria.

Some of us expect this sort of thing in winter. And others even welcome it

Case in point, the following video

(Most of this was shot with my GoPro, I decided to play with the settings, let's call it an experiment and leave it at that)

WOOFSTOCK TORONTO 2011: ONCE AGAIN THIS BLOG GOES TO THE DOGS

When does caring for your dog become over indulgence? Sometimes that determination is subjective; some people allow their pets on the furniture, we do. Some will tell you that permitting the dog on the couch puts you at their level instead of clearly demarking the ling between human and dog. Valid argument but I feel I do enough in that area to establish my dominance so to speak. Mostly, though, people just can't deal with the idea of sitting on dog hair. I'm used to sitting on hair, usually my own, it's not a problem.

This brings us to Woofstock. No, that is not the remembrance of the Woodstock Music Festival by an old hippie who's brain has been addled by overindulging in the smoking of red oger dogwood (it doesn't work .. or so I've heard)

Woofstock is a celebration of all things canine, held in several cities around the world and bi-annually here in Toronto. It has been running for several years and is quite popular be we've never before attended.

We did not take the girls. Held in the homey St Lawrence Market district, I knew that the festival would attract tens of thousands of people on a sunny Sunday (sunny Sunday, don't you love when that works out that way) in an area of closed off streets where they would have to be on leash ... not really an enjoyable past time for a pair of border collies who would much rather be off leash and running someplace, any place, fast.

But I had heard that were many vendors there, all in one location, selling their wares cheap and it was a nice day to and mingle with some dogs

There is a stage at Woofstock where people perform goofy dog tricks and display canine fashion. Now goofy dog tricks I can dig. I think all dog tricks are or should be goofy. That's what a trick is, just something silly, like a high five or playing dead or catching treats off their own nose. Tricks are different from discipline. Tricks are just for fun and to help develop a bond between you and your dog. Anytime I spend with the girls, giving them attention, is good for all of us

Doggie fashion is something else. I don't include warm jackets and boots in this; we live in Canada and some short haired breeds need a little help to enjoy the climate. Fashion is different. Fashion is putting angel wings on your dog, or dressing them in costumes.

I mentioned over indulgence. There you go.

Mostly we wandered around, picking up the doggie essentials; chuckit balls, poop bags, treats, some homeopathic meds for Hayley's arthritis and just having fun meeting the mutts and watching them play and interact.

I've gone to the dogs. How happy am I now.

NOTE: There is a video that goes with this blog but Blogger seems to be having a problem with my embed code and is garbling the video. Until I get things worked out follow this link to the video

THE MOMENT

Quiet now.

Make it quiet.

Turn off the computers. Turn off the TV and the stereo. Close the windows to shut out the drone of the traffic, the groan of construction, the metallic sound of the birds

Let it be quiet now. Just the sound of the wind pressing against the windows and of the house settling

Go quietly down the hall, walking slowly, moving soft. So as not to disturb them

They're in there. In the big quiet room with the sun sliding through the blinds and writing solar calligraphy on the walls.

Twenty minutes ago they were out with you in the park, all motion and sound and furry energy, legs pounding the grass and teeth flashing as mouths opened to catch balls and tails whipping in the air.

Now they're here. The old girl on the big chair with the blue blanket, curled up in a soft knot, nose tucked under the white brush of her tail. Snoring softly

The young one is in the corner of the sectional couch, also curled up, head half under a pillow, eyes shut tight, body slightly twisted, a tangle of white paws.

Quiet now. Resting. Totally satiated. The energy bled out of them, so that the warm furry bodies radiate a kind of peace. Stand there and watch them, bodies twitching occasionally as a dream passes under their skin, an ear twitching

But quiet. Still. As if they could lay there forever. But watch them carefully, listen to their breathing. Their energy is still there. Like a bow laying on a table, an inanimate object but by the grace of its curve and the tension of its string, still indicative of action. Of power and speed.

That is there in the two of them. But for now it's lambent. For now, they are peace and stillness.

For now. In this moment.

DEFINE SHELTER

Animal shelters. Gov't sponsored animal shelters. Like the Humane Society of Toronto and the OSPCA in Newmarket. It's where we take pets that are lost, hurt, abandoned. It's where we go to adopt a pet. We look to these organizations to protect animals, we support them fiscally to care for the animals we cannot. But how good are they, really, at this job

Earlier this year the Toronto Humane Society came under fire for its euthanasiation policy. Most publicly funded animal shelters kill .. let's call it what it is .. animals. We're told that this is done when the animals are hurt beyond repair but they are also killed when the shelter simply runs out of space. It seems that the THS was killing animals a little too freely. Euthanisation if it's done at all, should be an entirely last minute, no other choice option, this is what we are told. But the THS was killing animals who's health status did not warrant being put down. It's director, Tim Trow, was actually arrested for cruelty to animals ... and it seems this is not his first time

Now, who hired this guy to look after our animals?

Yes, we put our trust in the faceless bureaucracy that is our government.

Today I read a story about the Newmarket Humane Society. Seems like a case of ringworm got into their shelters. Now a few hundred animals will be put down. A few hundred. I know stuff happens, animals must be coming into these shelters in all levels of sickness. But you should know that, right. And these societies have vets on staff. You'd think they would be looking for these things.

A few hundred animals. Are you scared? Are you pissed? I know I am

Here's the other part: How these problems just seem to "pop up" out of nowhere where clearly, they must have been going on for some time. And once the problems are exposed, the people involved spend as much time and effort denying as they do trying to fix things.

Denial seems to be a pattern in these shelters. I have personally known several people who have adopted dogs from public shelters, dogs that are given a clean bill of health, only to later find that their new pet is ill, terribly ill, and has been so for some time. Again, these shelters deal with hundreds or thousands of pets and clearly, some things will slip through the cracks. But in a couple of cases I know, the new owner's vets inform them that it would be damn near impossible for a shelter not to have known about the animal's condition.

Sounds like a need to clear these shelters. Before the animals are killed

If you have an animal you need to give up, or you are looking to adopt an animal, there are alternatives: No kill shelters, rescue organizations. In Ontario, there are rescue organizations devoted to different breeds, they take in unwanted animals and foster them into a home where the animal lives in a healthy family environment until they are adopted

And for god's sake, never ever ever ever buy a dog from a pet store. My vet has told me that every dog they've ever seen from PJ's Pet, for example, has giardia, a serious canine illness.

Think about where your money and support goes. Think about the kind of government you have in your city, your province, your country. You know, that government that lies, bungles your money, covers up scandals, has their hand in the cookie jar ... you want to trust them with a pet?

Sheltering an animal should not be just store housing. It shouldn't be extermination. If they aren't, we have to do something about it.

LIFE'S A BEACH

I could have titled this post Life's A Bitch .. Two of Them .. but that would have been tacky and potentially offensive and when would I ever want to offend anyone *cough cough*

This week has been extremely spring like here in southern Ontario and it also happened to be Collette's spring break. So being us, when we saw the sun shining and the temps going into the double digits we packed up the girls and off to the beach we went

Hayley looked forward to the day so that she could work on her tan
Terra, however, decided the day was more suited to hunting sticks
Hunting sticks is not a simple endeavour. Sticks are crafty quarry. Devious you could say. You never know where they could be hiding. Sometimes they go turtle on you and dig themselves into the sand
Some times the wild stick could be hiding behind hills. Luckily, sticks cannot resist the super secret border collie inducement cry and can be "hollared" out of the hollows. Roughly translated into human speech, the cry means "Hey stick, get your ass over here so I can chew on you"
Hayley doesn't cry for sticks. She would much rather appeal for cookies. And who could resist such an appeal?

Back to the stick hunting. These Toronto Beaches sticks are particularly clever. When being hunted by puppy border collies, their last resort is to flee into Lake Ontario. This was especially effective. When we first took Terra to the beach last summer, she was very eager to swim. An entire winter has passed and now she finds herself having to relearn this skill. At first, she tried doing some kind of funky border collie dance to entice the stick out of the water ..

But the stick was impervious to this dance so Terra knew there was only one thing to do: Go swimming
Wrangling a stick out of the lake is no easy task. They are wily and agile and perhaps this particular stick came from special underwater trees cultivated by a race of sentient dolphins ... No, I haven't been smoking anything, I'm just tired. At any rate, it was no small feat for Terra to grasp her prey but she had help, with Hayley coaching on the side ..
So even though the waves looked pretty daunting to her, Terra is not easily put off her prey. She's never seen a sheep. For all she knows, this is thing she's supposed to herd

Hayley is not overly impressed. Here she is asking "If she eats the stick, does that mean I get her cookie?
So wrangling sticks is a solo activity. But there is one critter that requires two border collies to herd. A critter so baffling and strange it requires all the brain power to two herders to bring successfully home. Yup, it takes two border collies to safely bring home a "dad"
Below is a little video with some of our high lights of our day at the beach



Life's A Beach from Victor Kellar on Vimeo.



WHY DO YOU HAVE DOGS?

It's a question I get asked fairly frequently, especially since we've taken on Terra. It's a fair question. Dogs are a lot of money. They are a lot of work. They can restrict your movements, your freedom. They occupy a lot of your time. Double the dogs doesn't double any of the above factors .. it seems to triple them.

Except for poop. It quadruples the poop. . Seriously. It's some kind of physical phenomenon. Stephen Hawking should look into it

So, why dogs? When the vet bills or food bills roll in, when we're tired in the morning and don't feel like going anywhere but you get those four brown eyes staring at you .. I ask myself the same question

Today I got my answer.

It was a miserable day here in Toronto. The kind of weather I hate more than anything: Cold, grey and a cold stinging driving rain that almost hurts when it hits your face, that soaks your clothes through in seconds, that forces you to turn your head against it only to feel it slide down the back of your neck, wet and icy

I would take a blizzard over this any day. Without dogs I would have no reason to venture out in such shitty weather. I'd be huddled on the couch with Collette, watching B movies and drinking Bailey's Irish Cream and commenting: "You'd be fucking nuts to be out in this"

But there were those eyes. Collette had taken them out in the morning, it was now past the time we normally go for their afternoon weekend walk. They had been perfectly good, letting us watch a movie and eat breakfast, quietly waiting and now it was time, no it was past time and yes it's shitty but we really need to go ...

So yeh, I'm fucking nuts

I took them up to Earl Bales Park. We used to live closer to there and Hayley is very familiar with the park, the old road that leads down to it, the golf course that leads away from it, but Terra had never been. It's a big park, lots of trails and open fields and small woods. So I bundled the girls in the car and away we went

It was grey. Rainy. Cold. Miserable. But Hayley went down this familiar road with her tail wagging, finding trails she had not been in on in years and unerringly leading me along them; Terra went racing up and down the steep hills of the ravine, splashing through the rain puddles, barking in the trees .. at one point she raced straight up the side of a 6 ft tall brick wall and stood up there staring down at me as if to say "Wow, do you see where I am now?"

We played ball in a big open field and threw the stick on the fairway of the golf course. The rain sliced down the whole time. But the girls were running and barking and leaping and playing in the puddles

My eyes were slitted against the rain and it was sliding down my neck and my fingers were freezing.

But I was smiling

That's why I have dogs.

TO LEASH OR TO OFF LEASH, AND WHO'S BUSINESS IS IT?

This post has been inspired by events here in Toronto but it would relate to a lot of cities and a lot of people, I suppose.

Toronto has just announced approval of 29 more off leash areas in the GTA (Greater Toronto Area). These were granted under the new system where a group of locals petition the city, it goes through community vetting, having to meet certain pre-determined criteria, like size, proximity to playgrounds etc.

I'm of two minds about off leash parks. Obviously, you are free from the threat of being fined for owning a dog; yes I know that technicality it's for dogs off leash, I'll address that later, but come on, you own a dog it has to be off leash to be happy and healthy so it's all part and parcel.

The other benefit, is that you find dogs here; sure that sounds simple but it's a big city and some days I can go to my local park, which is on leash and not see a dog. If I go to Cedarvale Park, my closest off leash, I know I'll find dogs. That's important. My dogs are social, all dogs are (or should be) social and they love to play with other dogs. Hayley likes to herd them as sheep and Terra likes to use them to practise her Brazilian ju jitsu.

But there are downsides as well. Principally, a lot of people seem to think an off leash area, particularly a fenced in area such as Cedarvale, means they can give up their responsibility for their undisciplined, unbalanced dogs. I've seen people let their dog into that area and stay on the other side of the fence, with their back turned to the enclosure .. So now you have this strange dog running around, and its owner is paying no attention to it. Due to this kind of behaviour, I've actually broken up fights between dogs that don't even belong to me.

There are people who don't have control of their dogs, they normally can't let them off the leash due to this lack of control. But because they see this fenced in area, they feel they can let their dog go, not having any control, and let it basically run wild. I once had a situation where a dog kept stealing my ball and I couldn't get it back, which meant my girls weren't getting any exercise. I kept moving the girls further and further away and this dog kept hunting them down and taking the ball. Finally I asked the owner (who had been ignoring the whole thing) if she could just keep her dog over on that side of the park. Her response: She didn't want to tell her dog what to do, that's why she was there and if I couldn't handle that perhaps I should leave .... That was a Steely Dan, a bit of pretzel logic.

Some off leash areas work. There are ones here like parts of High Park and Sherwood Park that are trails inside fences where you can walk your dog. You actually have less interaction between dogs, people tend to walk and not hang out and let the dogs play. Which is the antithesis of what I want for the girls; I can walk them anywhere, on a leash, I don't need them to be off leash for that. I can leash walk them on the nearby Beltline all the way to downtown. What I'm looking for is a place where there are victims, I mean dogs, for my border collies to play with.

I have other opinions about off leash areas in public parks. (Yeh I know, me having an opinion, what are the odds) My question is: Why do we even need separate areas to play with my dog in a park? A public park. Isn't that a kind of segregation? After all, I'm a public, and so are my dogs. I mean, can't we all just get along? As I mentioned, the park a block from my house is not an off leash park and it's not particularly large but I take the girls there, meet other dog owners and even with a tennis court, baseball diamond and play ground, we find a space where we can keep out of the way and let the dogs play

Of course, I understand the logic here, the very points I made earlier, about people having no control over their dogs, and not particularly caring. I've seen dogs jumping on kids, raiding picnic basics and shitting at will, with an owner who has no clue and little interest in stopping them

You'd think the off leash law would help curtail this bad behaviour. It would be nice if the bylaw officers could target these irresponsible dog owners and fine them to the point they never let their dogs off the leash so the rest of us could. I've found that if dogs are controlled (which you can do without a leash) and owners are responsible and respect others, we really can get along. Everyone can enjoy their public parks

Unfortunately, the enforcement of the off leash bylaw never works this way. I would wager that the majority of fines handed out aren't for dogs running crazily around without supervision, or dogs behaving badly; most of them are given to people whose dogs are within a few feet of them, perfectly under control. Your dog doesn't have to be ill mannered, or dangerous or out of control, it just have to be off leash. So our erstwhile defender of public safety just has to walk up to a group of good owners with perfectly behaved dogs and begin writing tickets. This doesn't make parks safer, it doesn't change bad behaviour, it just makes the city richer.

You can't legislate behaviour and that's the issue. There are just too many irresponsible dog owners who have no control over their dogs and that makes it difficult for everyone else. This winter I've been disgusted with the amount of dog shit I've seen in the area, there is no excuse for that. I can't blame people, really, for demanding dogs be kept behind a fence. The problem is, I don't want to be behind that fence with their owners.

So I'm basically happy there are more off leashes but it makes me feel it's going to be more and more difficult to run my dogs in any public area I want, no matter how behaved they may be and how responsible I am. I feel limited to enjoy these public spaces and honestly, I don't think it's fair. But I don't see it changing any day soon.

So enjoy your public parks and areas, don't let bad dog owners off the hook, but don't paint us all with the same brush. And to the dog owners: Smarten the fuck up. Your dog is a huge responsibility. When in public you and your dog need control, and you need manners. If you can't hand that, buy a treadmill for poochie or at the least, keep him on his leash.

Maybe I'll make my own signs for the off leash areas: Dog area. Leashes not required. Common sense, definitely

BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID (BUT WHY?)

Fear is real. There are many levels of fear, from the little bugaboo in the back of your mind, to the overwhelming physical reaction that makes your palms sweat and your lungs ache

Collette has a terrible fear of heights. Its a real thing, a physical thing that literally paralyzes her. I have a fear of confined spaces. I've been stuck in elevators and been ok but dark, tight places with pressure above me, makes me feel that I'm going to suffocate. We know we have these fears, we know what triggers them, but we can't control them. That's what phobia's are.

Cynophobia is the fear of dogs. Its a phobia, like Collette's fear of heights and my fear of confinement/suffocating. It's a real physical fear that you can't control. People have cynophobia and I suppose people suffer from it in my city and I suppose that I have have encountered them, when out with my girls. I strive hard to make my girls good canine "citizens". They're never walked offleash on the streets and even when offleash, they've been trained very well to be under my control. When I see situations that I know will challenge that training (like little kids running around, they look like sheep) I keep my dogs out of it. But if you have a phobia, it doesn't matter, you're just scared, you can't help it, I understand that.

Then you have a fear of dogs that isn't a phobia per se, but is still very real. People who have been attacked by dogs, no matter how long ago, have a fear of dogs that can sometimes never be conquered. A friend of mine, a client, who's name is Bill, always had a hesitant reaction to Hayley and when we got Terra, I could see he was even more leery. He told me that as a teenager, he had been attacked and badly bitten by a friend's dog, a dog whom Bill trusted. He always did very well with my dogs, he never made a big deal of it, but he was afraid.

I know I've encountered people out there with similar stories. They're strangers, not friends. They owe me nothing Even if my dogs do nothing, these people are afraid of them and they probably wish there were no dogs. I understand that. It's fear, a real fear and its often out of their control.

Where this is all coming from is the reactions I have when I'm out with the dogs. My dogs are trained, they're under control, in the streets they're always on their leads yet we encounter everything from people screaming, to freezing, to snarling at me. So a small percentage have a phobia. A slightly larger percentage have a fear based upon a past attack. But what about the rest of them? I mean, these are very common reactions. Yes, the girls bring me many compliments but I get more negative reactions. Why?

I've heard that people have grown up in cultures that have a very different views of domestic dogs. Dogs in north america, generally, especially pets (as opposed to real working/hunting dogs) are very indulged, and certainly overindulged. When we were in Costa Rica and Belize, dogs were just roaming the streets, sleeping on the beaches etc. We were told that not all these dogs are strays, they were pets but they didn't stay in the house, they weren't walked, they were maybe put in a yard at night, to offer protection. Most of these dogs were not fearful or aggressive like feral dogs, they were domesticated, but not in the way I'm used to

Then you have cultures where there are no pets, just strictly working dogs. Or countries where some people's only experience with dogs are with guard or attack dogs. I could see you would be afraid of those dogs, but that's something learned and what is learned, can be re-learned. My border collies are not a danger to you .. unless you're a tennis ball.

If you live in a new place, you have to learn the new way. I mean, really, don't you?

When you talk about culture you often have to talk about religion too, as oft time both are intermingled. I know some orthodox religions have strict guidelines about humans interacting with dogs, probably stemming from ancient concerns about safety and even hygiene but let's face it, we don't live in those times anymore. Be that as it may, that's still not a true fear of dogs. You just don't like them, as your religion decrees, and hey, you don't have to own a dog, but don't jump off the sidewalk and call me a rude name because I have one. You aren't afraid. You're brainwashed. Get over it.

You saw the rant coming, didn't you? I guess my point is this: Collette and I have worked really really hard to make our dogs disciplined and good public "citizens" We work very hard to make sure that people aren't inconvenienced by our dogs. In the street we leash them, in the parks we keep them away from situations that we know will bother people, like playgrounds, picnic areas, soccer games etc. They have manners, they're obedient, but it still isn't enough for a lot of people.

If you're afraid, truly afraid, then I do feel for you, and I know your reactions are not always under your control. But I also think that the percentage of people with a real uncontrollable fear is pretty small. For the rest of you ... I respect you, show me respect at all. You don't have to love my dogs, but we're here, we have the right to be here, and just cut us a bit of slack. And hey, you know, if you kind of drop the veil and see my girls as they really are, you're gonna love em.

I mean, who couldn't?

WHY MY DOG DOESN'T PEE IN MY SHOES

Another post reflecting on Hayley's tenth birthday, ten years of living with the Queen Terror of the Dog Parks. If you want to skip right to the fun stuff, there is a video at the bottom of this post. This is itty baby Hayley, right after we got her, just a girl having fun, before she realized she was a working dog.

There is no doubt that Hayley means the world to me, and Collette as well, but I really wonder why that is. What is this connection between dog and human and human and dog ... that may be part of it right there. I feel a connection to Hayley and I'm pretty sure she feels a connection to me. Yes, and beyond the obvious "Hey dude, you feed me and if you stop that I would die or at least scrounge for bagels and lox and since I can't leave the house I'd still die" situation. In my last post I mentioned how Hayley seemed to bond with us so quickly. I took her away from her her mother, her litter mates and her farm yet very quickly she seemed to accept her new situation, her new role, her new pack.

Is that it? Humans are family creatures, certainly Collette and I are. Four siblings for her, seven siblings for me and for me, if memory serves me correctly, life at home with the fam could certainly qualify as being a "pack." Collete and I have had a dog since the first year we lived together and I am pretty sure we have had our cat Gypsy since the days dinosaurs ruled the earth and spam was a luncheon meat ... well, he's been alive that long at any rate.

Gigs was a great dog, we had him a long time and I regret none of the time we spent with him. But Hayley is different. Our connection with her is different. There is something there, something intangible and relevant and unquantifiable and demonstrable that you would have to call it love. When Hayley is just laying around, either on the couch with us or on the floor at our feet, she always wants to touch us. When we were visiting Collette's parents up north, her mom was laying on the bed with Hayley. Hayley kept moving towards her and Marg kept moving away till she was on the edge of the bed. "She doesn't want to share," Marg said. No, she does want to share, she wants to share you. She wants to be with you. To feel safe? To have warmth? To know your smell? Hell, that would be love .. only without the roses.

Hayley has been the easiest dog I've ever trained. Why is that? Is it my awesome dog whispery dog training skills? Um ... no. Is it the border collie's inherent intelligence, omnipotence and overall mastery of the universe as we know it? (OK, Hayley dictated that last line .. see, she's just freaking smart.) I once heard an Irish shepherd (and who would know more about a border collie) state that it really wasn't the breed's intelligence that distinguishes them (Hayley, stop frowning and growling at me, its unbecoming a girl your age) but rather it was their loyalty. That's why they are easy to train. They want to please you, they want to work with you, they want to connect.

Its a mutual thing of course. I don't think you can force a dog to any anything. You certainly can't use force on a dog. Any dog. And brother, you can't do that with a border collie. Hayley is trained, when on lead, to walk on your right. Sometimes we need her to switch sides. Yanking on that lead is not the way to perform the correction; saying "other side" or "over" is going to get the job done quickly. That is my part of the bargain. I am going to treat her with love, with respect and she's going to do her job. Not that she's never had a spanking but now just the word "spank" will make the bum drop and the border collie snap to. Its mutual. I don't scream at her, and she doesn't pee in my Reboks.

So yes, there is a very real connection between Hayley and us. But where does this connection come from? Well humans and dogs have been doing this dance for thousands of years and they've done it in pretty much every culture. We made these guys. Sure, there's still wolf in every dog. I've read that border collies actually have a lot of wolf in them; watch a working collie coming up onto the sheep, low to the ground, head flat, ears up, moving slow, shoulders bunched ... you can clearly see the predator stalking its prey. But Hayley, as much as she loves to stalk inert tennis balls, is no wolf. She is a dog. A dog bred to work, to be loyal, to hunt the prey down but right before that oh so juicy moment of pure canine fantasy ... give up the prey to the alpha dog. And not even get a succulent piece of mutton in return. Get a pat on the head, or a cookie, or some slow cat to chase. If we made them, do they belong to us, on some genetic level? Maybe.

But just having the baseline "genetic" connection is not enough. We've all seen dogs and humans where the connection is not present, its almost like there are two entirely different species in the room ... Ok, I put that in there just to see if Hayley is paying attention. "Different? What is this different you speak of kimo sabe?" The connection we have with Hayley is more than that. It is different, it is deeper, it is more personal, I truly believe that. Others have pointed that out to us. When Collette shows Hayley the nail clippers, our dog rolls onto her back and sticks her paws in the air. Hayley trusts Collette. And perhaps that's it. Trust. When Hayley was the puppy you will see in the video I was chasing her in the yard and accidental kicked her in the head. She ran yelping into a bush and would not come to me for a long time. Now, if something like happens, she comes right to me and wiggles and wiggles and touches my hand as if saying "you hurt me but I know it was an accident wasn't it?" Trust. Loyalty. A cold nose on a warm hand. That's a connection.

You can over rationalize this connection (gee, Vic, isn't that what you've been doing for a whole page?) and I enjoy thinking about but, really, that ain't so important. The connection is there, the bond is strong and as Hayley enters into her eleventh year it just grows stronger every day. Where it will lead us? I don't really know, but some times, when we are quiet and laying together in the hammock or on the couch and I look into Hayley's and see that is looking back at me .. really looking back, right into my eyes in that border collie way .. I have a feeling that even if I don't know, she certainly does.

DOG PARK ETIQUETTE OR WHOSE POOP IS THAT?

Its spring in Toronto. That's what they tell me. When Hayley and I went for our walk today we were being pelted with snow and there was ice underfoot. But its spring. Sure. And the check's in the mail.

But it has warmed up recently and the snow has been melting and that means two things: Mud, muddy dog, dirty muddy dog, dirty icy muddy dog, dirty icy muddy dog who jumps up on the couch before we get her to the tub ... Ok, that counts as one thing. The other thing that spring means to a dog park? Poop. Lots of poop. Poop everywhere. (Hayley glares at me. OK, not your poop.)

There is just an awful lot of dog poop in our little local part. As Cheech Marin might say "Homes, thats a lot of cheet" Where does all this shit come from? OK, I know where it comes from in terms from where it was issued (again, Hayley glares at me, like her golden bum could ever issue forth such organic dread). A lot of dogs come to our park on a daily basis, I know most of them. But really, there is more shit than mud. And shit in the mud. Or mud in the shit ... ok, that is way too many occurrences of the word shit in one paragraph, sorry. But you get my point.

What it all means, is that people in this city have no no real concept of dog park etiquette. I mean, rule number one "Pick up your shit!" (I said shit again but its a new paragraph, I do it like that) That seems an obvious rule, golly, they even have signs and illustrations and everything. Still, people ignore it. Cause people have no idea of dog park etiquette.

Another terrible breach of etiquette is the situation about toys. My toys (Hayley cocks an eyebrow) OK, her toys. We bring them, we want them back. Often, in the case of sticks, I hunt them down like Steve Irwin in search of sting ray stingers thru mud, snow and (you guessed it) dog poop. They are our toys. We want them back.

Fetching seems an arcane skill these days, rarely practised, barely understood, whispered about in shadowy alley ways and cloisters and kept back from the masses. It seems such an easy thing; human throws sticks, dog brings stick back. Or, it Hayley's case, human throws stick, border collies chases stick, runs with it for a time and drops on command. That works for us, keeps us both moving.

Now, Hayley, being a border collie and all, would much rather fetch dogs than sticks. And since people seem to object when I snatch up their pekipoodlelabdoo (or whatever) and hurl it across the park we've worked out a compromise: Human throws stick. Average-unfortunately-not-smartest-dog-in-the-world chases stick, border collie chases dog, dog returns stick, border collie slides in after the dog and smugly asserts "There, I brought his hairy hide back" Applause and happiness ensue.

Buy it doesn't happen that way. What happens is I throw the ball, dog chases the ball, Hayley lunges off in pursuit, dog catches ball, runs with ball .. runs with ball .. runs with ball ... Hayley stops, stares for a second and looks over her shoulder at me saying "Now, where the hell is he going?" I pose the same questions to his human and the response is usually "Oh, he won't bring it back" and off they walk, after their dog. With Hayley's ball. Sadness and regret ensue.

If they are not fetching they are also not dropping. And if they are not dropping I am the one running after them (ok, its more like a hobble but I've grown fond of it) putting them into a stay and prising the toy out of their jobs. All the while their owners stand there, muttering "Gee, he never gives it up for me" To which I respond "No shit, have you ever tried?"

Its annoying. And its rude. There are more breaches of dog park etiquette but its late, the morning comes early, and I have to go out and buy me some new dog toys