Tuesday, June 30, 2015

THE CIRCUS IS COMING! (AND I DON'T MEAN SHRINE)

Often, it seems, this city is not ours. During the G-8 Summit, with it's fence and its detention centres and its armed guards, it felt as though the downtown core of Toronto had been occupied by an invading force. Even though that force wore badges that said Toronto

The occupation is happening again, this time by some actual foreign invaders. How are we responding? Why, we're building them places to sleep, feeding them, giving them their own traffic lanes to make it easier to invade ...

Yup, the Pan Am Games are coming

Some of it is funny. As in, this thing is costing us a few billion bucks and it seems to be run by bipolar chimps smoking crack and weeping over Donnie Walberg's hair loss.

What's funny: They've turned some regular traffic lanes into HOV (High Occupancy Lanes) that are exclusive to vehicles carrying three passengers or more. They're called Diamond lanes because they have hug diamond symbols painted on them. Well these are temp lanes so they didn't want to use paint. Instead, they put down these huge decals. Here's the problem: The decals come off in the rain. And it's been raining. A lot

What's Not Funny: These new lanes are, essentially, being reserved for the "important" people. The officials and athletes and the local gov't reps whose Games these are. Yeh, their games, not so much ours. Their lanes. Two weeks to go to the games and they are enforcing these lanes right now. Cop cars are perched on medians to make sure none of us plebes are using the royal lanes. Don't worry about the traffic chaos; essentially one or two lanes have been taken from use on some of the busiest roads in the GTA; the DVP, the Gardiner, the QEW, Lakeshore, the 400

What's Funny: The planners of these Games knew how horribly traffic was going to be affected. Not only have they taken away some active lanes, they are not stopping the construction that already brings the downtown core to a crawl. Our govt's solution? Go on vacation during the Games

What's Not Funny: Our govt's solution? Go on vacation during the Games

What's Funny: Many new sports facilities have been built for the Games. These are the supposed legacy. But many temp structures have been erected as well; public parking lots and public streets have been closed off so they could put up these giant plastic quonset huts where the Important People can mingle and guffaw and say how marvelous they all are. Well, it's been very rainy and windy here. And the tents came down

What's Not Funny: Fences. Fences in my city are not funny. During the G-8 a fence was put up around several blocks downtown. Cops stood at the fence and questioned our right to even look at it. Now we have more fences, enclosing streets and areas that are public. Most of the people standing there are not cops, they are Pan Am security but it is clear: Hey, you live in this city, you can't come in here. Keep moving, see this clip board, you are not on this clip board, so get the fuck out of here

What's Funny: The people who are running these games are getting paid lots and lots of money. Lots of my money, lots of your money. When the whole thing got rolling, couple years ago, they hired a very respected manager to be the grand poobah. Turns out he was very good at padding his expense account and paying off people. The Gov't seemed quite content with this till he was exposed. So he was let go due to malfeasance. Here's the funny part: He got a "severence" (after being fired) that was basically his promised salary

What's Not Funny: They hired a new manager. This guy they seem to like. They like him so much that, when he finishes out his contract he will get a lovely party gift of a bonus that will equal what he's getting paid to complete the contract in the first place

Hey, no worries. There's lots of money for the gov't. So much money. It just keeps rolling in

Now, you, the person from whom this money is being taken, just sept back behind that line and keep your head down. These are your Games







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