It has been a crazy last few days. We have been on an emotional roller coaster, with Miss Hayley at the controls. Sort of.
Monday, she showed signs of not being well. Diarrhea, vomit but her energy level was OK. What alarmed us was her refusal to take treats. Hayley being fussy with her dinner was one thing, but turning down a treat is something else. That's like me turning down a cookie. Then Collette tried to give her the daily thyroid meds. We give her this pill in a little bit of cheese. Hayley refused it. We became concerned. That's like me turning down a beer.
We phoned the vet, let them know what was going, her symptoms didn't seem too severe, except for her refusal to take a treat. I made an appointment for her later in the afternoon. In the meantime I took the girls out for their long walk. At first Hayley was herself, energetic and showing an interest in the ball and in other dogs. But as time went on, I saw her grow more listless and more disinterested. At one point she lay down and didn't want to get back up when I told her it was time to do so.
Yup, she was not feeling well
So off to the vet we went. They took blood etc but really weren't sure what was wrong with her. She had a bit of a fever but otherwise didn't seem too bad. So we took her home to wait for the test results. Unfortunately, from midnight on, she vomited every couple of hours. She was weak and listless and clearly not feeling at all well. She was not even eating the food the vet sent us home with, canned chicken and rice ... that is like steak and mushrooms to me. Not a good sign
We took her in, the next morning, and they kept her. Her blood tests showed a little weakness in the liver, but years ago, she had some mild poisoning that gave her a mild hit to the liver so it usually responds to illness. They took X rays and this is where it gets scary.
The found something on the X Ray. Firstly, there were gas bubbles in the intestine, in of itself not surprising and not worrisome. But they found something else. A section of the intestine seemed to have an odd shape but they did not know what was causing it. If it moved, it would be more gas, if it did not it would be something else; either a foreign object that Hayley ingested, or a mass, like tumours
Miss Hayley is in excellent condition but she is almost 12 years old so those were things I did not want to hear. If it was a an object, I felt she was healthy enough to be able to endure the surgery and recover well. If it was cancer ...
So she was kept overnight and we waited. The vet thought if she continued to vomit, it was a sign that she was in trouble. And we had to think about the possibilities
It was scary of course. Heart wrenching. I say all the time that I love my girls. Most of the time that means playing with them, cuddling with them, taking care of them etc. But at times like this, I really understand what that love entails. It's a big thing. I've heard the cliche a "piece of my heart" At times like this, I know what Janis was singing about. Thinking about Hayley, there in the hospital, not doing well, I really did feel like a piece of my heart was being rended
It's funny. I am not the most demonstrative of people. I don't always find it easy to express the love that I have for people, like Collette and my family. Generally I try to let my actions express that love; I try to take care of people, to do things that make them happy. And that is a big part of having dogs. I devote a lot of time to them, I do what I can to give them healthy happy lives,that is my love
But when Hayley was at the vet's, with me here, I felt this pain. Yes, by taking here there, I was helping her but I still felt this terrible helplessness. I couldn't hold her, talk to her, stroke her fur, all the things I know make her feel better. I could only wait and prepare my mind for that ultimate expression of love; helping her life end in the most humane way possible. Just as we had done for Gigs, many years ago
Luckily, Hayley passed the night well, with no vomiting. They X rayed her in the morning and the images had not really changed. Generally she was doing better but the vet told me that Hayley just seemed "sad and depressed" I told her that may have nothing to do with her illness and that I was coming there
When I got to the vet offices, the girls at the front were laughing and shaking their heads. It appears that the moment I entered the building, Hayley perked right up. When they brought here out to meet me, hooked to an IV machine, the old girl was wiggling,and crying and licking my face. I took here outside for a few minutes, her ears were up, tail wagging and she had a big pee. Then we went back inside and I hand fed her some of the canned food, and she ate it like a starving dog
All good signs
They kept here for a few more hours, feeding her IV fluid and watching her. She ate a bit more and she did not vomit. She remained alert. They wanted to keep her overnight and I asked if she needed to be on the IV, the answer was no. So I brought here home. She was wiggly and excited. She ate ravenously. And she passed last night with no incidents
So she is here at home with us. She is doing very very well. We still don't really know what was wrong but it seems easy to assume it was something she ate, or perhaps even a stomach virus. At this point cancer is unlikely (though it's always a possibility) because she got ill so quickly. The problem with working dogs in general, and Hayley in particular, is that they are very adept at masking symptoms. She can be in pain and you wouldn't know it. Still, this thing came on fast and seems to have passed so I take that as a good sign
We will take her in to the vet next week for an assessment but at the moment it all looks good, we have her on the special diet and some meds to make her belly feel better. She certainly seems better. The moment she nips at Terra to prevent the puppy from running, I know our old girl is back to normal
Love is a kooky thing. It is so powerful and perverse. Love can cause you so much pain, just from a sad pair of eyes and a little whimper. But it can also give you so much joy, with the wag of a tail
I'll take the pain, for all that I get back from a warm furry head on my lap
No comments:
Post a Comment