TOP TEN WAYS TO KNOW YOUR MAYOR IS A CRACK HEAD

NUMBER TEN: First name Marion, last name Berry

NUMBER NINE: The mayor's personal security detail has been replaced by a pair of pit bulls called Stink Eye and Pinky

NUMBER EIGHT: The mayor suddenly has a lot of energy, like a lot of energy ... a lot .. like so much energy not only does he call all night sessions of council in his own city, but he jumps in his Escalade and goes to other cities to convene council there .. at three in the morning ... pressed against a councilman's window yelling "You gonna come? Huh? Are you? We can have a meeting, let's have a meeting, you wanna have a meeting, you gonna come?"

NUMBER SEVEN: You know your mayor may be a crack head because strange smells are coming out of City Hall, the new deputy mayor is referred to only as "The Cook" and his worship advices a visitor "Oh I wouldn't light up that cigarette here"

NUMBER SIX: The mayor makes an announcement that from now on he must be referred to as His Worship Snoop Dog

NUMBER FIVE: He replaces the city seal with something he refers to as The Great Pipe

NUMBER FOUR: From this time on City Hall will be known as "my crib"

NUMBER THREE: The mayor has been spotted trying to pawn a city bus because all he needs is "a little taste"

NUMBER TWO: When a reporter enquires where the mayor's secretary is His Worship Snoop Dog replies: "Ho is out earning me some of that sweet sweet smoke, what's a dude to do"

NUMBER ONE: And the number one way you know your mayor may be a crack head: First name Rob, last name Ford